i’m trapped
i just get this from one of the site i used to be at.. yeah.. i could tell i was trapped by what i feel for him that’s why constantly, he could use me because he knows the intensity of love i have for him.. yeah, i’ve been so fool and he’s been a user!
Add a comment April 8, 2009
and i’m saying goodnight
i’m a bit tired.. tired of crying because of what had happened early this evening.. i really cried so hard and i can’t find ways to stop my tears falling down into my eyes.. i really had enough.. i’m unsure with what kyxz do have for me, michael, that selfish jerk, i hate him for being like that and he’s the reason why i cried so hard.. paolo, a super assuming guy who believes that in the end, it was me and him! urgggh! i can’t find the right guy on their persona.. i was trying with kyxz.. but he’s so cold, i can’t feel he’s serious about me so i must play safe! if one day, i’ll be single again.. i should make it right! i should be happy about it not sticking with someone who’s not worth to have me at all. i’ve been single for almost 9months and i feel i’m still single now though i have someone to have but i can’t barely feel the commitment between us, i’m just trying to be nice at all. i love kyxz but if one day he decided to leave i’ll set him free with no hard feelings as joe d mango said, “don’t wave your hands with heavy heart.” see? i’m learning!
i must not focus myself of being hurt someday but how happy i am once i have them in my life.. my statement about kyxz doesnt mean i don’t really love him, of course i love him with all my heart and with all my soul! actually i cry when i miss him, tears may fall when he’s really sweet to me but i don’t want to be like what i’ve been like before. if one day kyxz and i will go in a seperate way, i’ll be glad that once in my life i met someone like him but i must face the fact that there will come a time that even it feels so right and you feel he is destined for me, anytime of the day someone will take him away from me. so i just cherish every single moment i have with him, i stay away from arguments and fights. i let him feel how much i love him and how much i care for him. even i don’t bother to tell him, i understand everything about him, for who he is, the time he has for everyone and even he left only few moment for me, undeniably, i accept everything with all my might. it doesn’t mean i don’t love him, but if this is my way to show him how much i really love him, i might sacrifice but i hope its all worth it for him to realize and to appreciate it.
it is true that i’m really different with who i am now and who i am before when it comes to relationship. i used to be a demanding girlfriend. i demand for everything from time, to things and everything i can demand for. now that i’ve been committed to kyxz who’s 5 years younger, i guess he’ll be soffocated if i demand too much of his time. if in a 24 hr basis, if he could only give 2hrs of his time all through out the day, then start to learn to understand it.
Add a comment April 4, 2009
.arguments.
hindi naman sa d ko matanggap na hndi pwedeng maging kami, but isnt its edna whos really childish if sh’es the one who deleted the post.. its very casual.. excited pa naman ako na ibalita nya sakin na naapreciate nya ung post, ni “salamat” wla man lng natanggap, bnura pa.. he used to be like that even before.. hndi ba dpat ako magsawa sa isang jerk n katulad nya! egghead! but i’m so stupid that i’ve become so nice to him! parang napapaicp ata ako na isa xang pagkakamali sa buhay ko!
Continue Reading Add a comment April 4, 2009
Echoes of our Heart by JOE D MANGO
Sometimes we close our eyes and just listen to the echoes of our hearts.. We all fall in love and there are times when we love so much that we lose ourselves in our own emotions. More often than not, we wonder why there are love that grows and love that grows cold. We would start to search for answers and try to find where love has gone wrong. But in the end, we find ourselves where we started for we cannot question love when it has its own reasons. Love will always be as it always has been.. silent, mysterious and deeply profound.. When we fall in love with someone, we dont want that feeling to end for it is everything we are, everything that we wanted to be. We pray that love will stay and grow in our hearts. But if it doesnt, then we should never let our lives be taken by it, for life should not end where heartaches begin. Many of us believe that love is forever, that love never dies, only to be disillusioned in the end when we find our hands empty and our hearts longing. We mistakenly have looked at love as a need to be fulfilled. But love is only a gift given to us. We should not hold it in our hands for we may never find the strength to let it go when it decides to leave. We should only embrace its warmth and glow while it last and then freely open our arms when its time to say goodbye. There is always a reason why we have to move on. When we have to say goodbye to the feelings we wanted to stay forever. Let us not wave our hands with a heavy heart. For love will have to set its wings free and find the place where it belongs. We may have lost it but then again, when we close our eyes and listen to the echoes of our hearts, we will hear that feeling resounding silently forever. Then we’ll know that it has never left us, for the good that we have become.. because love will always stay. It will always be there reminding us that we should be thankful and happy, not because we have lost love, but because, , for once in our lives, that feeling lived in our hearts and made us happy…
Add a comment April 3, 2009
THIS SONG IS FOR HIM :>
when i see him in my dreams, i wish it wouldn’t last… before i’ve become unconscious at night, i dream of having him besides me.. and when i wake up.. consciously, i was dreaming he’s still be by my side.. it feels great, coz there, no limitation was given to me.. and in that way, i can be happy and it feels like he’s mine.. i wish all of my life spent in dreaming and i wish no mornings to come for me to be able not to missed him.. this doesn’t mean i’m hurt or what, it was like.. my fantasies helps me to become happy and fulfilled again, who doesn’t want that? hugging him so tight, spend almost all your time for each other.. all these can come true when you start dreaming.. so everyday, when i’m away and not in my busy mode, i wish i was in bed.. i wish i’m with my huge pillow, dreaming of him and forgetting of wishing he was with me.. because fantasy helps me to overcome my reality.. that’s really nice.. i got new ways to pamper myself and new technique for me not feel pain.. and now.. if time comes i remember him when i’m not in bed.. is that.. i miss him 
basically it is true that the only person who could help you out to solve your problem is yourself.. so i learned how to help myself by picking those things that will enlighten me.. this would not mean of i’m taking the chances of having him again but taking the chances of feeling better.. a unique way to illuminate my positive side so that i would not be like i’m emo again.. this is my way to be optimistic.. this way too, i could comfortably helps myself to react on changes in a positive way.. there is no such as easy thing in life.. it takes time to learn things accordingly.. i might not be as good as others at least i tried it on my own.. in my own simple way i help myself to become better and i believe that in everything God will never let this happen without further reason and purpose for the near future.. it might be unclear now but someday i know the answers will be right in front of me.. so as of now.. just let me to do this.. it will help..
When I Dream About You
There was a time in my life
When I opened my eyes
and there you are.
You were more than a dream,
I could reach out and touch you,
Boy that was long ago.
There are some things that I
guess I’ll never know.
When you love someone
You got to learn to let them go.
When I dream about you,
That’s when everything’s all right.
You’re in my arms
Here next to me, forever.
When I dream about you,
bOY you never go away,
Just close my eyes
Wait for my dreams
Cause I still love, loving you.
How can I get you to see
That I’m falling apart
Since you’ve been gone.
I can never be sure
I could ever let go
Your love is much too strong,
There are some things that I
guess I’ll never know.
When you love someone
You got to learn to let them go.
When I dream about you,
That’s when everything’s all right.
You’re in my arms
Here next to me, forever.
When I dream about you,
bOY you never go away,
Just close my eyes
Wait for my dreams,
Cause I still love, loving you.
There are some things that I
guess I’ll never know.
When you love someone
You got to learn to let them go.
When I dream about you,
That’s when everything’s all right,
You’re in my arms
Here next to me, forever.
When I dream about you
Boy you never go away,
Just close my eyes
Wait for my dreams,
Cause I still love, loving you.
1 comment December 27, 2008
